I'm convinced that the reason most beggars aren't more entertaining is that they're really undercover sociologists.Think about it, they're probably judging your reactions and noting them down via bluetooth recorder. You can't tell, after all it looks like they're just madmen in the street talking to themselves. In reality, they're muttering "Subject #347523, Thursday, gave me $5, confirming alpha paycheck-generosity correlation hypothesis to within 0.05%, 19 times out of 20."
The real professional beggars out there are cheerful, brash, entertaining, imaginative, inventive (while being no less smelly or filthy looking because they have an image to maintain) and know EXACTLY what they're doing. They realize they've tapped into a Jungian gold mine.
These clever entrepreneurs manage to make more money every hour of the day than the average electrical engineer, all because they know that some people have troubled social consciences. Those people think they passing the geld along to someone down on their luck will alleviate some of the guilt so they can go home to their HDTV and watch satellite EuroPorn without feeling guilty.
Don't worry too much about the professionals; they collect welfare and go home to watch their own satellite EuroPorn. The reason sociologists are such unpleasant beggars is because they don't get enough grant money to afford satellite EuroPorn.
Fortunately for me, I had all the guilt receptors in my social conscience surgically removed years ago, but remember folks, if you give to one of those unfortunate "street sociologists", please remember to ask them to forward you a copy of their dissertation and to request an update on their results to date. You may learn something and it might even validate their meager and unfortunate existence.
Just don't mention EuroPorn, that'd be like kicking someone when they're down and it just isn't nice.
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